Partying With Atlantis...A Break From Alaska...The Econo Story Revealed...Goonies Never Say Die!

Well my friends, its been a while, I slacked off a bit, but the watch is off and its time for another fine edition coming to you from Tha Lair.

The reason that I haven't had a chance to post is due to the fact that I have been working my ass off here aboard the GTS Infinity, that and the sense of melencholy that sweeps over this place while in Alaska is enough to force one's self to board themself up in their cabin, and not come out until the sun does...NEVER!! But I have been had at work as I just got done with a Gay Cruise. No I don't mean "Gay Cruise" as in, "that place sucked so bad, it was so gay," I mean "Gay Cruise" as in lisping and ass-less chaps. The team that chartered the ship is called Atalntis, and they brought all their own equipment and entertainers aboard. And though I worked 78 hours last week, it was actually a good time. See, your typical Alaskan Cruise Traveler is old and it seems almost a chore for them to even be here, but these people know how to party. And the highlight of the week, meeting and working a show for Debbie Gibson. That's right, Miss Electric Youth herself! All in all, Atlantis was a great expierence, but I will say this: Every stereotype that you have ever, EVER heard about gay people is true, and there was at least on person to fit each stereotype here last week.

*and on a side note to Adam and Joe, I actually did see gay cowboys eating pudding.

That week officially brought the redundancy of 7-night Alaskan Voyages to a close, we are currently on our way to San Francisco from Vancouver B.C., Canada. We had two stops in Canada thus far, one in Victoria, the capital of British Columbia. A nice place too I might add. It reminds me very much of Evanston, Il (BREE!). And the other place was one who had a nice feel to it, but had a strange name that I can't be bothered to remember. Today we were in The States in the town of Astoria, Oregon, but I'll get more into that later.

I got several e-mails asking about the "Econo Story" from my last post, so here it is: My second job in this world was working as a Stocker at Econo Foods supermarket. A good job for a 16-year-old. One of the managers there (*cough cough* BURT *cough cough*) had the responsibility of checking the store to see what we needed, and then loading said merchandise from the warehouse onto carts for the stockers to...well, stock. After a while, I was asked by this manager if I would like to take on this resposiblity, and I was happy to. Anything to get me out of bagging groceries for ornery old people. I did this job, and was happy with it for a while, until I noticed that this manager was doing NOTHING throughout the store on the days I was doing his job. I was getting paid the same as everyone else that was stocking, yet doing more work. I went through the channels to get a raise out of this, and after a few months of empty promises from the management, I got fed up with it. I went up to the break room to find Burt sitting there BSing with one of the emlpoyees, and that was it, I was sick of Econo. I walked up to Burt, took off my trandy maroon Econo Foods shirt, handed it to him while saying, "Burt, you keep that," and waled out the door. The rference to this story was due to the fact that there have been several times since being here that I have wanted to do the exact same thing.

Astoria, Oregon is beyond a shadow of a doubt, the BEST place that I have been to thus far. It might have had something to do with the company (Frank, a sax player, Allen and Debora, both singers, and Daniel, a dancer...all from The States baby! <- a hard thing to come by on this ship). Astoria is the location at which the cinematic masterpiece "Goonies" was filmed. We walked several mile to find the Goonies' house, and all took our pictures outside doing the Truffle Shuffle! En route there we stopped by a local supermarket where Frank and I hijacked those moterized shopping carts that lazy fat people like to use cause it winds them to push a damn cart. It didn't take too long for us to get kicked out. Really though, if you're not supposed to crash the things into displays and play bumper-carts with them, there should really be a sign or something. Astoria is also the filming location for "TMNT 3", "Short Circut", "Free Willy", and another favorite, "Kindergarten Cop"! I got my picture taken playing on the swings of the school at which it was filmed. Another cool thing today was being 10 feet away from wild seals. Big scary beasts they are! I'll be sure to post all these pictures as soon as I can.

I guess that winds things down for another week. I want to plug Adam's debut with the Superior Wrestling Aliance (SWA) this weekend on Labor Day, email him for the details and check it out! Also, Adam and Roy will soon be doing the YWO Show again. Look for that podcast to start coming your way very soon. Who knows, you might even see Soul Brotha Joel make an appearance from time to time.

That's it for me. This is Joel saying peace, props, and chicken pox to all my homies along the way!

~peace out yo!
SBJ

Wine an Cheese Night....Cabin Attendants are an Unruley Bunch....Duty Day Leads to a Near Econo Miss....Stick it Where the Sun Don't Shine

Last night was my first "Wine and Cheese Night." Something that, in theory, should be quite fun, and if done properly would be a great activity for the crew to get together and blow off some steam. However, its nothing more than the bar staff setting up a table with different wines and cheese on it. The wines are the crap-list of Berringers and Merlots that the guests, generally being versed in wine (or at least have deep enough pockets to just buy the most expensive), tend to snuff their yuppy noses at. The cheeses are little more than the traditional cheddar, swiss, and pepper-jack that you'll find at your poor cousins graduation party. While the premise of the night was a waste of time, the night itself was salvaged by the conversation of the winos in attendace, and the steady influx of Milli Vanili and Debbie Gibson music videos pooring over the television.

Paul and I also got a new cabin attendant this week. The idea behind the attendant is basically the same as a maid in a hotel. Its nice, you never have to vacum, clean the bathroom, or make your bed. Thumbs up there. Then each pay period you are expected to "tip" these people for their services rendered. However, I have a hard time giving anything (outside of a middle finger and scathing remarks) to someone who is rude and fails to do the job that I am supposed to be tipping them for. This guys is basically a jerk. Its not a way that goes into great description, but there are sometimes in our lives that "jerk" does just fine. He rarely does his job, and when he decides that he's ready, he'll knock on the door to tell us that its time to leave. Sorry pal, that's not how this works. And I say "pal" and "this guy" not out of disrespect, but because he didn't even have the curtosey to introduce himself to us.

One thing that's always fun at any new job is learning the ins and outs of the equipment that you'll be using to perform your daily tasks. When you're a "technician" its expected that you'll be able to handle the equipment to which you are assigned, and if not there should certainly at least be someone on the team who is capable of teaching you this new skill. Not always the case I've found out. I was recently told on my last duty day to patch in audio from broadcast to the observation lounge. Now I had no clue how to do this, so I of course asked, and I didn't get the same answer from a single person on my team. The answers I did get ranged from patching from the IRIS System in the theater, to simply lining a mic up with the intercoms. Though there is tell floating around that there is an actual way to do this, though I have yet to discover the fabled system tool. The frustration from this (and the rest of the BS through out the day) nearly lead to anther "Econo Foods" incident. Luckily, I was in the middle of the ocean, so that made it pretty tough (if you don't know the Econo story, leave a comment and I'll post it).

I was begining to think that when someone tells you to "stick it where the sun don't shine," that they were talking about Alaska, but I guess asses across the globe heard about this and put a word in with the guy upstairs because they have retained their title, at least for the time being, and I think Alaskan's are happy about this, "The Stick-It State" wouldn't look too good on their liscense plates. Since Sunday, the weather has been beautiful every single day. Clear sky with temps in the upper 60s and 70s! I didn't think such a thing was possible.

And lastly, I watched what will probally be my only Green Bay Packer game of the season Thursday (@ G.B. vs The Chargers), and I have to say that I was quite entertained, especially for a preseason game.

That's it for this week. As always, leave lots of comments and e-mails, I thrive on that stuff these days.

peace out yo!
~SBJ

Another week, another day of rain...Seasickness is a terrible beast...Fear and Loathing in Juneau

I've gotten several emails asking me what about Alaska can be so bad, and for hard-core outdoors enthusiasts the answer is not much, however most of us that come from "God's Country" or Da U.P., Alaska really isn't all that special. If you're in the U.P. right now, look out the nearest window. Ok, now imagine a mountain in the background...good, now you have Alaska. Admittedly there are some interesting things such as the Hubbard Glacier, but that is the kind of thing that you see once, and after close examination of ice melting, you realize that now that you've seen it once, you really don't need to ever again.

Another wonderful thing about Alaska is the rain. One of our ports of call, Ketchikan, proudly boasts that it is the "Rainfall Capital of North America." Oddly enough, it is the only port in which there hasn't been rain this week. On a normal week though you see sunshine in Vancouver, B.C. then probaly won't again until you're back in Van.

Up until last night I was proud of the fact that I have never really gotten motion sickness (Carnival rides don't count, I never count anything but together by the dregs of society smack in the middle of a terrible coke binge). I've been able to go on rides at Six Flags all day and be non-the worse for wear. I've been on a catamaran all day long on open seas and not felt the slightest twinge of a stomach twist. Like I said, until last night. Last night we had such huge waves that my innards would only put up with so much. And now that I've been in bed with her, motion sickness is a cruel mistress.

And lastly this week, I've been in many political talks lately, and I'd like to say that it is quite refreshing conversing with people that haven't been corrupted by the poison of American media. I came across this, and I do believe that this is the direction of the Democratic Party:

"Remember the Whigs, Larry? They went belly up, with no warning at all, when a handful of young politicians like Abe Lincoln decided to move out on their own, and fuck the Whigs...which worked out very nicely, and when it became almost instantly clear that the Whig hierarchy was just a gang of old impotent windbags with no real power at all, the party just curled up and died...and any politician stupid enough to 'stay loyal' went down with the ship."
Hunter S. Thomson
"Fear and Loathing: On the Campaign Trail '72"

Something to think about, and with new up-and-comers like Barak Obahma (yeah I probaly slaughtered the spelling) I see this as the near future.

Until next week, keep it real, and keep the comments/emails coming.

~peace out yo!
SBJ